You have two choices.
1: To stay on your knees and continue to live a miserable life for the rest of your life.
2: You get up on your feet, hail from the bottom of the darkness you’re in, and become the real you. The strong you. You are a good, loving mother and person, yet you let the illness take over and control you.
Do it for you, because no one loves you more than you do. No one cares about you more than you do. Only you can make yourself shine through the darkest of nights.